


My Wounds Are Yours To Heal

by MariaVT



Series: For My Next Trick... [1]
Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Alternate Universe - Military, Alternate Universe - No Green Arrow (Arrow TV 2012), Alternative Universe - No Island, Assumed Relationship, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, First Kiss, First Meetings, Hurt/Comfort, Military Backstory, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-10
Updated: 2020-02-10
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:54:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22643701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MariaVT/pseuds/MariaVT
Summary: After a long and well decorated career in the Army Oliver Queen is transferring to a duty station closer to home. He is not the same trust fund brat that left Starling over a decade ago and he isn't sure what sort of life he'll be stepping in to.He meets Felicity Smoak at Verdant his first night back, a woman he's sure is dating his best friend, but when things get dicey she follows him out of the VIP section and soothes the storm raging inside him, but at what cost?
Relationships: Oliver Queen/Felicity Smoak
Series: For My Next Trick... [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1628872
Comments: 75
Kudos: 165





	My Wounds Are Yours To Heal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am trying something a little different this year, I'll be posting three one shots that all have the potential to be multi-chapter, If you enjoy any of them please leave kudos or a comment so I know which one has the most interest, Thank you!

Master Sergeant Oliver Queen was not always a distinguished and well decorated soldier. Once he was a wild trust fund brat that cared more about partying than his sad attempts at higher education, or even his family.

That all changed when his longtime girlfriend Laurel caught him cheating on her, with her sister Sara no less. It was understandably messy, and the next morning on his walk of shame toward the docks and a boating trip with his father, hungover and feeling more pitiful than he ever had in all his life, Oliver somehow stumbled into an Army recruiting office.

By the end of that week he was on a flight to basic training and Ollie, the billionaire playboy was no more, in his place there was ‘Private’ as in, “Is that the fastest you can run Private?!” or “Get your ass up Private!” or “Did I ask for your opinion Private?!” Basic training was the hardest thing Oliver had ever done at that point in his life but through the routine, through the physical tests, through the forced discipline, a better man emerged.

That man found his way into the x-ray program, the path to Special Forces in the middle of nowhere North Carolina and two years after basic he earned his green beret as an engineer sergeant, a Charlie.

Still wet behind the ears he moved to his first real assignment in Florida, and within weeks he was in country, a short trip to South America where he fell in love with his work. Those three years of team life took him from a brand new soldier to a veteran that spent more time in country than on American soil, moving from his original assignment to a top tier team of operators. His missions were confidential, the locations of which he couldn’t even divulge to his family when they called to speak with him, or saw him on their infrequent visits.

And at the end of that team contract Oliver returned to his roots in North Carolina to train other soldiers for a short time, the whole place looked so different from the other side and it was in conversation with fellow cadre that Oliver learned of an opening on ‘The Unit’ for a soldier of his skill.

His three years with combat applications group went beyond even what he saw on the top tier SF team. It was hard work, important work, but at times it was horribly dark. He had nightmares before, as did most people in his line of work, but the things he’d witnessed with CAG were beyond what his nightmares could create. Those years branded him among the most elite soldiers the United States had to offer, the most badass, the sneakiest, the most important. But door-kicking came at a cost and when his tour with CAG was up he decided to make a move to slow down his career.

“Can I get you anything sir?” A flight attendant broke through Oliver’s wandering memories and he turned to face her.

“No ma’am, thank you.” Oliver spoke softly, a tight smile on his lips until she moved on.

He scrubbed both hands over his face as he peeked out the plane window, he could feel himself sweating through his undershirt and the muscles in his neck and shoulders ached with tension. Planes were synonymous with spinning up on mission and Oliver couldn’t convince his body otherwise.

His most recent move would take him as close to home as he had been in over a decade. He was returning to SF as a team sergeant, a post in Washington that would be within driving distance of his hometown. His anxiety spiked even higher at that thought, the idea that he would have obligations to family for the first time in so many years. The expectations to be the perfect son that drove him into his debaucheries and ultimately to the Army.

***

“Some part of me hoped you would call. I’ve been waiting by my phone like a teenaged girl.” Oliver spun to the source of the voice, striding into the foyer of Queen Manor.

“Tommy Merlyn.” A smile stretched Oliver’s face as he embraced his oldest friend.

“How are you doing buddy?” There were a few grey hairs dotting Tommy’s temples, some smile lines around his eyes, but that boyish smile was exactly the same as Oliver always remembered it.

“I’m alright.” Oliver responded, his hand clapping onto Tommy’s upper arm. “How are you?”

“Alright? I think we can do better than alright.” Tommy’s smile turned into a mischievous smirk and Oliver knew it spelled trouble. “Come out tonight.” Oliver opened his mouth to protest but Tommy pressed on. “I’m meeting up with friends, it’s going to be a great night, and you need to be there. Would it kill you to have a little fun? For me? Please?” Tommy pressed his palms together gave Oliver his very best puppy eyes.

“I have to work tomorrow morning.” Oliver sighed, running the edge of his thumb along his fingers. “I can’t stay all night-.”

“Yes!” Tommy shouted then immediately settled. “Sorry, it’s just, I’ve missed you man.” When Tommy put it that way Oliver felt his heart softening further.

“Me too buddy.” Oliver cleared his throat softly before the chick flick moment got any more sappy. “Are you staying for dinner? Raisa made chicken marsala.”

“Absolutely.” With his bright smile back in place Tommy led the way to the dining room.

Oliver sat at the head of the table in the seat that once belonged to his father. The sailing trip that he planned to take the day he signed his first Army contract ended in tragedy. The Queen’s Gambit went down in a storm in the north China sea and there were no survivors. The memories the chair held tugged at Oliver’s nerves, what it meant to now be the eldest male in the family and hold this seat, but in it his back was close to a wall and he could easily see all entrances and exits to the room. No amount of time on American soil could turn off his situational awareness, it was always there under the surface, ready to move, ready to defend, and with a room full of people he cared about that were entirely untrained he couldn’t let his guard slip.

“How are you settling in Oliver?” Walter Steele, Moira Queen’s new husband, asked from the other side of the table. Oliver liked Walter, but it was impossible not to feel the weight of his father’s absence every time he saw a different man holding his mother’s hand, or hugging his baby sister. He knew that his stepfather’s presence had made a positive impact on his mother and sister, for that he was grateful, but he wasn’t ready to forge a deep relationship with Walter himself. Not yet.

“I’m all settled in my new apartment, I called mom’s decorator to have it furnished for me before I landed. I’m just looking forward to getting settled in at the compound tomorrow and being introduced to my new team.” He gave a polite smile.

“That sounds… good.” Walter stiffened slightly, his words awkward even to his own ears.

“I’m sure it will be.” Oliver gave a stiff nod.

“So Ollie.” Thea’s voice cut through the tension from his left. “What can you tell me about your most recent trip?” It was a questions she had asked him countless times, there wasn’t much Oliver could tell her about his work but he always enjoyed the game.

“Sometimes it was cold, sometimes it wasn’t.” Oliver started, pursing his lips in thought. “From where I slept I could see the sky, I drank a lot of great tea, and we ate the most delicious bread I’ve ever had.” When he finished he turned a soft smile to Thea and she smiled brightly in return, she was so much older now than when he left, she had been only twelve, but she still had sweetness, happiness, and innocence in droves. Things he could hardly remember in himself.

***

Oliver pulled on a suit that hung in the closet of his old bedroom, his mother insisted that he send updated measurements every six months so he would have clothes that were in fashion the handful of times he had returned to Starling in the last decade. The suit fit like a well-tailored glove and Oliver hated it. He longed for unwashed Crye’s, a soft shemagh around his neck, and the comforting weight of his kit on his chest, his rifle sling across it.

He took a deep breath to clear the thoughts and try to settle the tension in his back before he made his way down toward the foyer.

“You ready?” Oliver asked Tommy as he descended the stairs.

“As soon as the slowpoke gets down here we can go.” Tommy nodded toward the stairs before his attention returned to the phone in his hand.

“Slowpoke?” Oliver asked, his mind spinning, he didn’t think anyone else had come into the house but with a residence this big it can be almost impossible to hear the front door open from the bedrooms. Oliver made his way down the rest of the stairs and turned to wait for the other person, his feet unconsciously planting and his muscles finding a taught stillness that would allow him to move any direction in a moment’s notice.

Thea started making her way down the stairs in a jumpsuit that seemed to be made entirely of dark blue sparkles and Oliver startled.

“Finally, are you ready to go your majesty or do you need a band of handmaidens to follow you?” Tommy’s voice was teasing and Oliver’s eyes bounced back and forth from his best friend to his sister.

“Is that a Queen joke? I thought you were better than that Tommy.” Thea gave a longsuffering sigh as though this was routine.

“Wait…” Oliver spoke suddenly, cutting through their banter. “Thea isn’t coming with us.”

“And why not Ollie?” Thea asked with both eyebrows raised.

“We’re going out to a nightclub.” Oliver said, as though the issue was obvious.

“I told you we would be hanging out with friends tonight, Thea is among those friends.” Tommy clapped a hand on his friends shoulder and Oliver flinched badly, his shoulder moving out from under Tommy’s hand before the other man could blink. “Sorry.” Tommy snatched his hand back with a grimace.

“It’s fine.” Oliver cleared his throat. “But Thea you’re-.”

“Twenty-three? Older than you were the first time you were arrested for driving under the influence, oh and assault, and grand theft auto, and who could forget public urination?” Thea placed one hand on a slender hip and leveled a challenging stare at Oliver. “Any further questions?” Oliver flattened his lips into a thin line and shook his head just slightly. “I thought not, let’s go.” Thea led the way out of the house and into the drive, accepting Tommy’s hand to help fold her long legs into the car.

They pulled up to the front of Verdant, the club Tommy had opened several years prior and the flash bulbs and press of bodies lining the sidewalk to the club make Oliver’s heart pound in his chest.

“Could we maybe drive around the back?” Oliver asked softly, forcing his voice to stay unaffected. “Just so we don’t make a scene.” He shrugged, his unbuttoned collar still feeling too tight.

“Um.” Tommy shared a long look with Thea. “Sure, let’s go through the back.” He called up to the driver and the car slowly made its way through a key pad locked gate and to the back alley of the club.

“Glamorous.” Thea remarked as they stepped through the alley

“You’ll survive.” Tommy rolled his eyes at her and opened the back door, music came pouring out, along with strobing lights and the smell of canned air. Oliver took one last breath outside, more comfortable with the tang of garbage in the alley then with the playground of his youth through the steel door.

Stepping in to the club Oliver started to scan the space, it was a tactical nightmare, so many bodies, and so many unlit places where visibility was almost non-existent. He felt completely naked walking in with no weapon and no armor but he pushed everything down and forced a small smile to his lips.

“Let’s go straight up to VIP.” Tommy called over the noise, an easy smile on his face. Thea and Oliver followed right behind and the slightly smaller and less populated upper floor allowed Oliver a small sense of relief.

Tommy started introducing Oliver to a group of people that were waiting, a few faces familiar but even then he could hardly recall them, the rest were strangers, a sea of new faces that didn’t stick in his memory longer than a moment. There was a bottle of champagne chilling in a bucket and Tommy wasted no time pouring glasses and proposing a toast.

“To my very best buddy, we are so happy to have you back home.”

“To Ollie.” Thea echoed.

“To Oliver.” The rest of the group joined in.

“Thanks guys.” Oliver gave a tight smile and glasses tipped up all around the room. As soon as he was able Oliver sat in a corner booth, his back tight to the wall and the best possible line of sight to watch people as they drank and laughed. He kept much of his attention on Thea, making sure she was safe. His eyes swept the floor over and over, the routine of it soothed him, calmed that nervous energy that had been racing through him all night.

Oliver knew how to lie in wait and once he’d settled into all the sensory overload he let his mind find that quiet place that he could live in for hours. The sort of place that kept his hand steady on breach charge, his finger calmly braced beside his trigger guard, his eyes trained on an entryway until he could assess if the body walking through it was a threat.

He stayed in that place until he was jarred out of it by a woman. She was so unlike all the other clubgoers that she made the alarms in his head go off and he focused all of his attention on her. She was dressed in a soft pink blouse, a few buttons undone at her throat and tucked into a high waisted black skirt. Strappy nude pumps elevated the outfit but she still looked like she should be walking into a board room, not a night club. That was further evident by the tablet in her hands, all of her attention lowered to the screen and a red pen held between her plush lips. Oliver watched as she pulled the pen out, made a mark on her arm and replaced it in her mouth.

She was utterly stunning.

He didn’t remember standing.

He didn’t remember approaching her.

But suddenly his hands were on her upper arms and her eyes snapped up to him with a squeak.

“I’m so sorry.” Her eyes widened. “I was not at all looking where I was going.”

“No, it’s not your fault.” His voice was soft but he could tell just by looking at her that she heard him clearly.

“Felicity!” Thea’s voice cut through the buzzing tension between Oliver and the woman who must be Felicity. The two women shared a tight hug, both of them smiling brightly and Oliver’s head tilted slightly as he observed them. He’d seen several people interact with Thea that night but none that she greeted so personally, almost like family.

“There’s my girl!” Tommy’s voice drew Oliver’s attention and he watched closely as his friend approached the stunning blonde. Her face seemed to light up even more when she looked to Tommy and Oliver felt an odd lurch in his chest. Tommy wrapped her in a tight hug, dipping her slightly and planting a smacking kiss on her that Oliver couldn’t quite see.

“Thomas Arthur.” She pressed a hand to her pink cheek, seemingly flushed from his attentions. “We are in public.” Her blush deepened and Oliver couldn’t stop the thought of how lovely it looked.

“I owed you that, and you know it Ms. Smoak.” The smirk that Tommy gave her was more than a little suggestive and Oliver diverted his gaze, not wanting to intrude on their moment. “Oh Ollie, this is Felicity.” Tommy gestured to Oliver with one hand the other settled gently on her waist.

“Felicity Smoak?” Oliver spoke, the urge to taste her name on his lips too strong to ignore. “Hi, I’m Oliver Queen.”

“Of course.” She turned the full attention of her sky blue eyes on him and he felt himself getting pulled into their depths. “I know who you are.” She smiled and extended a small hand toward him, her tablet falling to the crook of her elbow with practiced ease. “You’re Mr. Queen.” 

“No, Mr. Queen was my father.” Oliver said.

“Right, but he’s dead.” Her eyes widened comically. “I mean he drowned. But you didn’t.” She took a deep breath. “Which means you could come down to Tommy’s club and listen to me babble… which will end… in three, two, one.” The pink of her blush moved up high on her cheekbones and a soft smile tugged at the corner of Oliver’s lips.

“How about a drink Lis?” Tommy’s arm slipped all the way around her waist and Felicity gave a nod, her teeth stapled into her red lips. Oliver watched as they retreated to the VIP bar, Tommy’s hand comfortable on the curve of Felicity’s waist and Thea leaning in on the other side to speak close to Felicity’s ear. She bowed her head to Thea then they turned to face each other, smiles on both of their lips. This woman was clearly very close with them and yet Oliver had no idea who she was. It was more than likely his fault, being as disconnected from his family as he had been over the years. He couldn’t remember Tommy mentioning a girlfriend, but that’s certainly who Felicity was, perhaps it was time for Oliver to take a more vested interest in the lives of his loved ones.

With a small shake of his head Oliver retreated back to his corner booth, easily falling into the rhythm of scanning the crowd, though he did find his eyes often drawn to Felicity, her golden hair was secured in a ponytail and he was transfixed by the way it bobbed and twisted as she moved. Eventually she turned and started toward him.

“Is this seat taken?” She gestured to the rest of the empty booth and Oliver shook his head. She slid onto the bench and to his surprise she scooted in close beside him, clearly intent on engaging him in conversation.

“I have to warn you, I’m not terribly good company in this setting.” He shot her a nervous smile. “To by honest I’m not terribly good company in most settings.”

“You sound like me.” She shot him a big smile that seemed so effortless, he envied that joy that seemed to radiate from every inch of her. “I’m not much for nightlife but I try to make an appearance once a week or so to keep Tommy happy.” Oliver watched as Felicity’s eyes drifted to the man in question, surrounded by people laughing as he soaked in their attention.

“He certainly seems happy.” Oliver gave her a tight smile, he envied Tommy even more for the chance to hold all this joy in his arms, but even if Oliver had that chance he shouldn’t let his darkness taint her light, that wouldn’t be fair to Felicity.

“Can I tell you something a little silly?” Felicity’s voice was light and Oliver found himself nodding for her to continue, wanting very much to hear whatever she had to say. “I chose tonight to make my appearance because I heard you would be coming.” That lovely blush dusted her cheeks again. “It’s just… I’ve heard so much about you from Tommy, Thea, and your family and I wanted.” She gave a soft nervous laugh. “I wanted to thank you for your service.” Oliver’s heart dropped but before he could dismiss the sentiment she continued. “I know that’s an empty statement that you must hear all the time from strangers, please don’t take it that way.” Her small hand found his forearm, the warmth of her hand bleeding through his suit and soaking into his skin. “You have made unimaginable sacrifices and I’m grateful for the work that you, and all the men who served beside you, have done.” The blush in her cheeks was still there but she squared her shoulders with conviction.

“Thank you.” He said softly. His hand turned over and before he realized what he was doing his large palm wrapped around the arm she was holding him with. They both stared at each other in the dimly lit booth, the tension growing more thick with each breath that passed in the small space between them.

Then the familiar pop, pop, pop, of gunfire filled the air and Oliver just reacted.

In the space of a heartbeat Oliver pulled Felicity closer to him by her arm, hiding her small frame behind the bulk of his body as he slid further down in the booth and furiously checked for the source of the gunfire. The pressure on his chest felt like a mortar round and he strained his eyes in the poor lighting.

Desperate to find the threat.

To eliminate it.

To protect her.

His heart pounded in his chest but the pressure of a hand on his cheek startled him into whipping his head around. Once he was looking at Felicity the world snapped back and he realized the length of his body was fully pressed against his best friends girlfriend and his whole body was coiled with tension, he must look insane.

“It’s okay Oliver.” Felicity’s hand was gentle where it cradled his cheek. “It’s okay, it was just the confetti cannons downstairs.” The words made absolutely no sense, which was surprising for a man that spoke eight languages. The all-consuming adrenaline in his body faded and all that remained was shame.

“I’m sorry.” He gasped, pushing himself back roughly and stumbling out of the booth. “I’m sorry.” He repeated, scrubbing both palms over his short hair as he looked for a way out, there was a dark hallway and he bolted for it, walking just slow enough to not make a scene. The first option was a restroom but there could still be people in there, the next door has a sign on it that read ‘management’ and Oliver immediately reached for the handle. It was locked but with a sharp twist of his wrist he snapped the lock and made his way into Tommy’s dark office.

He collapsed onto the black couch against the backwall and dropped his head into his hands. He couldn’t breathe, it felt like his lungs were banded down with iron and his suit was suffocating him. He tried to swallow the lump in his throat but it just seemed to get bigger. His heart slammed against the wall of his chest and he wondered if he was actually dying. He had been shot, stabbed, blown-up, struck by vehicles, and so many other things in his time serving with the Army, but it seemed that this was how he would actually die.

“Oliver?” The voice was so soft and his head snapped up to see Felicity standing in the doorway, her hands wringing together, and her weight shifting from one foot to the other. “Oliver? Can you hear me?” His eyes stayed locked on her as she approached slowly, her hands staying in plain view. But when she was almost close enough to touch he shrank away from her.

“I don’t want to hurt you.” It took everything in him to spit out the words.

“You won’t.” She scooted just an inch further and he flinched away from her again. “Okay, I won’t come any closer.” She squatted down on her heels, a few feet from him. “But I need you to do your best to breathe Oliver.” He quirked his head at her, the soft soothing sound of her voice washing over his trembling body. “Do you think you could count for me? Backward from ten?” She set one hand on her knee, extending it slightly toward him with her palm up. “I can start, and you can join in whenever you feel ready.” She gave him a warm smile and he couldn’t stop darting looks at her palm, unsure what she wanted. “Ten, nine, eight.” She counted slowly and Oliver looked back to her face. “Seven, six, five, four.” He watched as her red lips made each sound. “Three, two, one.” Her hand creeped a little closer and he eyed it warily. “I’ll keep going okay? Try to help me count when you’re ready.” She counted through two more sets before Oliver found his voice.

“Ten.” His voice was a dry croak and he swallowed before continuing. “Nine, eight.” They counted down to one together and Felicity’s fingers just barely bumped against his. Instinct had him slipping his hand into her much smaller one, their fingers lacing together. Felicity moved to sit beside him, still holding tightly to his hand, he watched as she settled into her seat. “How are you feeling?” One of her hands slowly raised to his face wiping at his cheeks he only now realized were wet with tears.

“I’m… fine.” He tripped over the words a little and his cheeks heated.

“You don’t have to be fine.” Her fingers tightened on his, her head tilting slightly. “I’m not here to judge you, I just didn’t want you to be alone when you looked like you needed help.”

“How did you know?” He wasn’t sure if he was asking how she knew what would help, or how she knew he needed help in the first place. He didn’t think it mattered.

“I have a very dear friend that served, he has similar scars.” The hand not holding his drifted up to brush against she shorn hair at the side of Oliver’s head. “The kind you can’t see.” The sweetness of her smile seemed to soak into the very soul of him and he had almost no control over what happened next.

He surged forward and pressed his lips to hers.

Those red lips were so soft under his, and they parted slightly on a soft gasp. His tongue slipped into her mouth and hers slid forward to meet him. One of his big hands reached up to cradle her head gently, his fingers sliding into her silky hair and she let out the sweetest little moan he’d ever heard.

Far too quickly Felicity gentled their kiss, pulling back slowly and biting down on her lower lip. Without pulling harshly she managed to slip her fingers from his, slowly raising herself from the couch and taking a healthy step back.

“If you keep going down this hallway there is a window that opens to the fire escape.” Felicity spoke softly, her posture nervous. “I figured you might want to slip out while you have the chance. I can cover for you with Thea and Tommy.”

It felt like someone dumped ice water over Oliver.

Tommy.

Felicity belonged to Tommy.

What had he done?

“Felicity I’m sorry-.” Oliver got to his feet quickly, stumbling a little on his tired legs.

“You never have to apologize to me.” Her eyes were clear and her shoulders square as she said it, she clearly meant it. “You should try to get some rest when you get home.” She started to make her way to the door, but she paused with one hand on the broken handle. “Goodnight Oliver.” Her red lips turned up into a soft smile.

“Goodnight Felicity.” With his hoarse words she slipped from the room and disappeared into the darkness. Oliver waited a moment in the quiet of the office before taking her direction and making his way back to the car, his thoughts full of blonde hair, and red lips, and soft pale skin that he shouldn’t want.


End file.
